We’re All Going to Screw Up Our Kids
Sometimes between watching our friends’ seemingly-perfect lives unfold on social media and listening to parenting ‘experts’, we get to thinking that we aren’t doing enough to give our kids THE BEST CHILDHOOD EVER. That they’re going to be miserable, irresponsible, lazy adults and blame it all on us. So, we kick our parenting into high gear for awhile. We yell and lecture about responsibility and hard work at every turn. We force crabby teenagers to join us for “fun” family activities to build memories (aka take photos to look like a “normal” family on IG). Basically, we stop being us and start being what we think society indicates we should be.
Here’s the thing, my fellow parents: we are ALL going to screw up our kids to some extent. I 100% promise you that you will and so will I. There is no manual for this stuff, and even if there were, each child’s instructions would be different and millions of pages long. The whole idea of a “perfect” childhood or being the “perfect” parent is completely ridiculous.
When my kids were younger, I fell into this trap pretty frequently. I thought everyone was judging me and each time one of the kids stepped out of line that was a direct reflection of me being a failure as a parent. The truth is, nobody was really paying that much attention because they were busy worrying about their own stuff.
I still have to remind myself sometimes that what kids need most is unconditional love. And, man, even though they sometimes make me want to lay down in traffic, I love my kids more than I could ever describe.
Bottom line is: the vast majority of the things you think you’re messing up on? You’re good. And for those big things that you just can’t shake? Turn to a friend, a family member, or a parent coach. All of us need backup sometimes. Just remember, nobody is perfect. Even that friend on Facebook who does crafts with her kids every day that you kind of want to smother with a couch cushion.
Regal Behavior Solutions is here for you if you decide parent coaching is for you! Reach out to us and let us know how we can help. We are judgement-free and very easy to talk to because, frankly, we get it!